Physical Therapy II

Cloee's PT is going really well. Chris has helped Cloee so much in just a few weeks. She actually has a neck now! Cloee is always so tense and nervous and it is just natural that she clenches her shoulders up to her ears. It is something that no one would ever know she does- but I can sure tell the difference and so can Chris. Chris loosened her up by mostly just pushing her shoulders down towards her feet to stretch, stretch, stretch her out. Cloee is also looser in general. Her arms are often bend in an 'L' shape while being held. Sometimes now she will relax as I hold her and not be so frightened and tensed up. It is nice. Chris works with Cloee on rolling. She will help her roll over and help get the arm underneath her so it won't be in the way. So she rolled her from her back to her tummy. Then all of a sudden Cloee arched her back and cocked her head back and it flipped her right back onto her back. I was so surprised, as was Chris, and Cloee shocked the crap out of herself! We were laughing so hard- kinda interrupted the calm mood that is needed for the PT session, oh well. She did a lot of work with Cloee's legs and hips to help her bowels keep moving and to also get the joints and muscles ready to eventually start to crawl- which is down the road but not so far that it is out of sight. :)
Chris is hoping that if Cloee starts to loosen up then she won't be so nervous all the time. She gets so overstimulated so dang easily. She cries A LOT! It drives me nuts because I expect her to be happy unless she is tired, hungry, or poopy, but I have to add overstimulated to her list and that one is hard to fix. Sometimes I wish she could talk to tell me what she wants because I just can't figure it out- less noise, she's too hot/cold, feels gassy, wants me to take her outside, wants her bed/binkie/booboo/bottle, etc etc etc. What!? What!? What do you want Cloee!? And secretly I even wish I could sometimes give her back to the NICU. What did they do to her? j/k I know it's not their fault. In fact it is my fault because my body is what failed and caused her to come early. Can I put her back in and let her 'bake' a little longer? Boy if I could have I would have- not just to avoid all that is going on now but to not have had to have her go through all she went through in the first few months of life. Can you imagine what it would feel like to have collapsed lungs and not be able to tell anyone? Gotta just rely on a nurse to watch the monitors. And then to have a few stupid nurses that just thought she was holding her breath. Come on now, like she's gonna just hold her breath. What an idiot. If I could have gotten that one lady fired I would have. I never should have left that night when I knew something was wrong with my baby. Ok I'm done ranting. First I was crying and now I am just plain angry. I think I will just go hold my baby and appreciate all that she went through to be here. She's my little fighter girl!!!